Prudential Longshot Insurance
Insurance with the stability of an iceberg.
Standard Hazard Policy
Our Standard Hazard Policy covers you in the event that a snow blinded Inuit hunter
accidentally shoots/spears/harpoons you. You will not be covered if you at the time of
the accident are wearing a fur coat, hat, leggings, and boots. You may be warm... but
you look like food.
Night Golf Rider
Our Night Golf Rider covers you in the event that an Inuit hunter accidentally
shoots/spears/harpoons you. You must wear proper reflective clothing. You will not be
covered if you at the time of the accident are wearing a fur coat, hat, leggings, and
boots. You may be warm... but you look like food.
Spring Break Up Rider
The Spring break-up rider is for those who can't wait to get out and bang the ball around at
the first sign of spring. After a long winter normally clear thinking Polar Bears have their
minds on romance. This policy covers you in the event that you are mistaken for a female bear
trying to hide by masquerading as a human. However, you will not be covered if at the
time of the mistake you are wearing a fur coat, hat, leggings, and boots. You may be
warm... but you look like a female bear.
Storm Rider
Our Storm Rider protects you in case of a sudden and severe blizzard and sudden drop in
temperature. You will not be covered if you have not taken an accredited course in igloo
building. You will not be covered if you are not wearing a fur coat, hat,
leggings, and boots. You must stay warm.
Fine Print
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